When was the last time you felt uncomfortable, frustrated or overwhelmed?
The doozy of the day you had on Friday?
Your last phone conversation?
This morning?
Whether big or small, these situations arise because we have come to the edge of our comfort zone in one form or another.
We’ve talked about this before, our brains like to conserve calories. One way they do this is relying on our habits and familiar patterns to navigate our work and lives. When we encounter something outside of these comfortable patterns, we’re jolted out of our subconscious brain function and into conscious thought. We’ve crossed over the edge of our comfort zone into a space that requires us to think in new ways, costing us energy (or calories) to navigate.
Sometimes these edges are undeniably noticeable, like being in the unknowing of your next career move or feeling the pressure of a looming business decision.
Other times it can be subtle, arising as a tiny nudge saying, “that didn’t feel good” after a meeting with someone.
In both of these, you have come to the edge of what’s comfortable. And as a leader or business owner, your greatest opportunity for growth lies in understanding what edge you crossed and how to better navigate this uncomfortable territory.
It’s no surprise to hear what I’ll say next. Two great spaces to do this are journaling and working with a qualified professional such as a coach, mentor or therapist (depending on the subject matter that keeps coming up.)
But why?
Because most of us don’t take the time to pull back and objectively look at the circumstances a particular situation might be teaching us. We just plow forward, stuffing, ignoring or numbing the discomfort without taking the opportunity to learn.
When we learn, we expand our self-awareness, which widens our comfort zone, adds tools to our tool belt and we’re better equipped for similar situations in the future.
Whether journaling or coaching, the primary goal is to observe what’s going on. Here is a list of great questions to dig below the surface of the situation; pick a few and write out your answers:
What didn’t feel good about that situation?
Where did I come to my edge? (In my energy, emotional capacity, subject matter expertise, overstepping my core values, a boundary was crossed…)
What is the emotion I’m feeling?
What would have made that situation feel better and why?
If my body is holding any stress from the situation, what am I noticing? (ex. tight shoulders, headache, knot in your stomach…)
What are the thoughts I’m thinking or stories I’m telling myself about this?
Where else do I notice this pattern in my life?
What do I have control of here?
What information would be helpful to have?
What would make me feel safe?
Who do I know that handles things like this well, what would they do?
What would the most courageous or confident version of myself do to successfully move forward?
If you’d prefer a conversation to journaling, click the button below. I’d be happy to set aside some time to give you the experience of a coaching conversation.
Here's to moving beyond your edges!
Halle
ps…if you’re not yet following me over on Insta, click here to do so!
Plus a few other links of interest:
1. TIMEOUT, a 2-day private coaching retreat! Travel to the resort town of Traverse City, Michigan for an escape from distractions to clearly think, regroup, prioritize, and plan.
2. Could your team benefit from upgrading their leadership? Inquire about Leadership Essentials Academy, a 6-month leadership training & coaching cohort for new and emerging leaders.
3. Time for a new journal? Pick up a new copy of my Know Thyself Journal for daily support towards your most important intentions for the next 90 days.
4. Are you into individual assessments? Here is a link to take a free Core Values Assessment (CVI). It only takes 10 minutes and measures your innate, unchanging nature. Take it yourself and feel free to forward it to a friend, too.
Comentarios